After writing and admitting to myself that I use physical work as a means of avoiding my emotional sadness, I’ve lost the NEED to finish my big project. I came out early to play with Annie before the temperatures rose. I looked at the ladder and the work I started on my balcony. The desire to continue the chore, just wasn’t there. Luckily, I get to decide when I want to return to my project.
Annie and I played for quite awhile this morning. I discovered that she had confiscated a dryer ball and brought it outside. She wasn’t thrilled about not getting to play with it. I don’t feel sorry for her as she has over 30 outside toys already. Tennis balls and squeaky toys are her favorites. Today her poop emoji toy from my cousin was the chosen favorite.
Sitting on my swing with, Annie turned into laying on my swing, once Annie decided to chase the squirrel on the power line. It’s a giggle watching Annie run along the yard while the squirrels tower above on the power lines. Swinging means I was fortunate to watch the hummingbirds, the bees, and the butterflies enjoy my trees. I am grateful for the calm daylight hours.
The forever din of freeway noise is actually comforting in some ways. It tells me life goes on, people go about their business, and I am fortunate to have my home that brings me peace. I hope I can find a new place to live closer to the beach in the future. Yet, what I dream of and what I can afford, are at odds with each other. I need a single story and less square footage to tend to. After 35 years, it’s time for a change. I need a single story home with less upkeep.
I shall continue to work on my projects making the improvements that I can. I have to complete many WIP that need my attention. I realize I need to hire professionals for some of the jobs. With the difficulty in getting materials and tradesmen that actually show up, I wish I was more skilled. (And younger)
I went to an open house in my neighborhood yesterday. It is the third I’ve seen this month. Sadly, it was another example of putting lipstick on a pig. They did a nice job painting the entire house. They put new cheap, laminate flooring throughout the main living areas. One bedroom had a very slanted floor. The house is built on a cement slab. That is going to be a nightmare to repair. The backyard was an unholy mess of rocks and weeds. Another small fortune will need to be spent on improvements. The garage door is separating from it’s frame. (cha-ching) The price they are asking seems totally out of reason for the shape the house is in. When I do sell, I want to have my house in tip top shape.
I had a couple of phone calls while outside. There are a few wonderful women in my life who keep me grounded and comfort my soul. I am grateful for their presence at this time of my life. Having been pretty much a loner, I never expected such deep relationships at retirement age. All my energy was devoted to my kids, my career, and family. There wasn’t much time left over for friends.
I completed a few minor chores outside after leaving my swing. I returned outside later to watch the sun set. It is an amazing view for me. I watered my planters and trees. Annie and I played again until she got tired. I would have enjoyed staying out longer, but that would have meant covering up my entire body because mosquitos love me. I still had two new bites despite my short outside time this evening.
Annie has her thunder shirt on. The fireworks have started, So far, so good. I’d like to spend tomorrow evening covered up, sitting on my swing. I won’t do that because Annie is too frightened. Wherever I go, I know I will need a swing to enjoy my yard and view.