Sadje is our host for the Sunday Poser prompt. She has a doozy of a question today.
In your opinion, how far can a person go for a loved one? Or what can they tolerate? Another way to ask this question would be; Do people love another irrespective of how they are treated?
I think it depends on numerous factors. When we are young we might not be as aware of how we should be treated. When we are married, we try (often too hard) to make things work. We might allow the relationship to continue because of children, societal factors, or family pressures.
I don’t believe you can still have the same love for someone if they treat you badly. I don’t believe any man or woman should stay in a relationship where they are being physically or mentally abused. Society would step in if they saw an adult abusing a minor. Yet they often look the other way is the same thing happens between spouses.
I ended my marriage after almost two decades. I finally accepted that his not listening to the advice of numerous counselors meant he had no desire to change for the better. I felt I had done all I could. I felt like a failure, but I knew I could not continue with the dysfunctional marriage.
As far as loved ones that are family, it takes a great deal to sever the relationship. Bio-dad passed away never knowing me, my kids, or my grandkids. I have family members that have dissociated with me, or me them. All were the outcome of years of disrespect. With friends, even loved ones, walking away is a little easier.
The bottom line for me is to treat people like I want to be treated. If that is not possible, then a relationship probably isn’t either.