Rory’s 24 Hour Question – Vanity Metrics

How influenced are you by the number of ‘Followers’ a social media site/blog has, or are you not?  I am not influenced by numbers of followers on a blog. I have followed a few with thousands of followers and a couple with 25 or less. Sadly, some of the blogs with few followers have stopped blogging. It’s quality over quantity for me. 

Do you think blogs/websites and so on should display follower numbers, or should they be hidden? It makes me no never mind. (colloquial I have no strong feelings or preference (about something) one way or the other.) I am interested in comments much more than likes. Likes do serve a purpose to see who is reading though.

Rory’s 24 Hour Question

 Rory’s blog is about political correctness today. He asks: ” Is the ‘Etiquette’ of Good Manners Really Dead?”

Rory’s Questions
1)  Do you think good manners are dying from society? Sadly, I don’t think parents are teaching manners anymore. As the years went by and I was teaching the children of students I once had, there was a clear difference in the way the parents acted and the children did. 

2) Do you think that political correctness is the ‘modern’ form of etiquette for society today? I think PC is not the same as etiquette. I open doors for men, women, or anyone nearby. I believe in please and thank you. I try to compliment someone any time I am out and about. It has nothing to do with being PC. PC can get out of control. I think if you purposefully go out of your way , to treat or speak about someone unkindly that you are not being PC.

I was raised saying gesundheit (bless you) and danke schön (thank you.) Once a gentleman politely opened a door for me. I responded with a danke schön. He loudly said, “What’s wrong with you?”  His colleague tugged at his arm and said, “She just said thank you!”  All I heard then was an OH.  You can’t assume someone is being rude if you don’t know what they said. I was being polite and he was being unPC.

 3) Which do you think is better – political correctness or diversity correctness? Diversity correctness is a new term for me. This is what first came up.
I am unaware if this term is used in business here. IMHO I believe everyone should accept and appreciate diversity in others. PC is sometimes used as a weapon.
If I accidently refer to someone as he or she and they prefer the term “them” they can tell me their preference without feeling I was attacking them.
If someone says Merry Christmas to me, I do not become offended. Because I am Jewish, it is not PC to say that to me. I typically reply with thanks, or  Happy Hanukkah to you. It does however seem to me that more people are offended by my Happy Hanukkah than I have ever been about a Merry Christmas. Sometimes, I just reply Happy Holidays.
People erroneously tend to think that others believe what they believe.  An example that jumped into my head, was a certificate from my vet that came with my dog’s cremated remains. The certificate went on and on about how Christ would ease my loss. It offended me as I was already in pain and felt it inappropriate. 


Rory asks, “Is Being Alive Really Better Than Being Dead?”

Rory has asked a very deep set of question for his 24 hour blog question. 

Is Being Alive Really Better Than Being Dead? What do you think about this? Are there more reasons to be alive than there are to being dead? Also, how do you define your purpose to being alive or what gives you purpose?



So many thoughts on this topic. I am going to go with being alive is better than being dead provided there is some sense of comfort or joy. I do not have the belief of a place called heaven, nor a place called hell. 

I do believe that there is some sort of continuum of spirituality. I have no proof of past lives, but I have had some experiences with past life thoughts and feelings.

I am of the opinion that anyone who has the true desire to be assisted with ending pain (in whatever way that manifests) should be able to do so.  I was there when my mother was told of what was going on inside her body. She had already decided what her line in the sand would be. She courageously decided to sign a DNR and to end all treatments. She knew where she wanted to go for hospice care. I had the responsibility to make all the arrangements. When I got to the place I broke down and could not go in for quite awhile. She made her decision, and I felt it was right, but I was not ready to let go. It was one week from entry into the hospital to entry into hospice care. 

A friend last week decided to be taken off all life support. Her cancer battle was long and hard. Cancer was everywhere and her pain was not being controlled even with a morphine pump she had control over. She talked with family and friends before making her decision. Those concerned were sad that she made the decision, but understood. She passed away two days later. In her case, like my mother’s, death was better than being alive. 

I have had three experiences where I was not supposed to live. But I am still here. I have had out of body experience, but I do not seek death. I am not sure if it is the “not my time” syndrome or a guardian angel, or pure luck. It really doesn’t matter. But I do feel I am still here for some reason. Am I still here to be a parent and grandparent? Am I still here because someone needs me? Am I still here because my clock has not run down? I don’t know, nor am I sure if it matters.

For years, I had frequent panic attacks about dying. They were horrible and I feared death daily on some level. A few years ago while in therapy for PTSD, the topic of when I had first experienced panic attacks came up. I clearly remembered they started after I had my second child. I thought I had the attacks because I now was responsible for two wonderful living beings. What I discovered, was that the panic attacks started when my best friend passed away in a terrible car accident right after my daughter was born. After having the awareness, the panic attacks stopped.   

For me, being alive is better than being dead because I have some choice as opposed to none. My body is flawed, it is in pain, and it has limitations. But, I have survived and I find joy when I can. I look for gratitude everyday because that in itself brings me joy.


Rory’s 24 Hour Blog Question

Rory’s 24 hour Blog Question this week is sure to have lots of replies.

Do we still care enough for people in today’s society or have we become an uncaring society only looking out for ourselves?’

Sadly, most people seem to be out for just themselves. The people I usually run into don’t even use polite manners. I had a nail in my tire and yesterday I had to go to the tire shop to get it repaired. The mechanic repaired my tire and checked the air in all the other tires as well. I thanked him and he seemed shocked to receive a compliment. He walked away with a smile. How easy is it to just be kind to each other?

Rory’s 24 Hour Blog Question – Quirky Space

Rory has posted a question for his 24 hour blog question. I made it this time in order to answer. As my answer was more than a few lines, I decided to blog my answer.

“How much quirky space do you have as opposed to practical functional space in your house/home? Is it enough or too little or are you a minimalist that doesn’t need too much space – practical or quirky anyway?”

When I moved into this house it was a disaster. I knew it needed cosmetic help, but I had no idea how bad it truly was. The house was 20 years old and my family was only the third family to live here.

The fact that it had strange finishes in every room meant I was in for a lot of work. I needed more space than the house offered. After I removed the fake wood and veined mirrors on each side of the fireplace I found flocked red velvet nudes wallpaper underneath. My first “paid” project was to have custom birch shelves built in. I needed the storage for books. After many years (and another bookshelf later) the shelves are decorative on top and store scrapbooks on the bottom.

Each bathroom needed more space so over time I changed the sink cabinets to give me more storage. I had the tiny powder room cabinet updated to a custom cabinet for more space. 

After I purchased my home from my ex, I did some major space upgrades. In the dining room, I had a floor to ceiling, wall to wall, oak built-in shelving installed. I designed it to hold my salt and pepper collection, my music box collection, as well as many of my books. I have no idea if the next owner will find it too quirky and take it out, or will love the space.

I needed more closet space immediately. The master bedroom has one, not very large closet in it. By myself, I raised the clothes bar, added a shelf, and built shelves to store more clothes. I built a half bar on one side. I didn’t know about companies that redid closets in the 80s. I didn’t have money to have it done anyway, so I did it myself. I am unsure if the next owner will find it too quirky and will tear it out for a custom job. I ended up raising the rods in every closet. If the next owners are not tall, I imagine they will lower them all. 

When I moved in, the attic was filled with junk. Mind you, you had to climb up through a three by three foot opening in the hall closet to get there. We removed old toilets, windshields, tires, and a large crazy assortment of garbage from the attic. When the house became mine I had the entrance changed to a custom door, but the size could not be altered. I had plywood installed (which I pained) and I put up metal shelving units for storage in half the attic. The quirky strange space became usable for many years. Now that I am downsizing it is getting emptier and emptier. Thank goodness. 

The space below my stairs is in the garage. It was pretty useless and I wanted to changed that. It was always full of dust. I had cabinet doors installed so the quirky space could be used as a clean storage space. It now houses boxes of gifts for loved ones as I find them. 

The guest room closet upstairs was used by the former owner as a CB station. There were antennae in the upper attic and wires everywhere. I removed the wires but left the make-shift countertop in the closet. I changed the quirky space to a table and added shelving for games. The grandkids liked looking through what I had. After cleaning out the closet last year, It is now empty. The downsized collection of games now reside in a small thrift store cabinet I repainted.

I still needed more space for “stuff.” My garage is covered with remnants of carpet. The dogs and grandkids used the space. A car never lived there. I had a storage shed built outside on a side yard a few years ago. The metal one I had before was no longer usable and it leaked. My new  shed was filled with gardening items on one side and painting supplies on the other. After purging and cleaning it out, I am happy to say it is now usable quirky space. 

I have added usable space to every room in my house. I see them as useful and necessary. Others may see them as quirky and overkill storage. After living here all these years and soring my belongings, I am now working hard to downsize my life. I will never be a minimalist though. It’s not in my genes.