SoCS – Where I Am or Where Am I? A Saturday Ramble

Linda is our Host for SOCS. Today’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is …

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “—amble.” Add letters to the beginning of “-amble” to make another word or use it as is in your post. Enjoy!

My life personal life “issues” have been on overload lately. Adding the awful SCOTUS to my list of worries, just makes concentrating even more difficult. It feels like my emotions are in shambles. I love blogging and it has been a life saver in many ways in the past. I know why I’ve not been up to blogging. SoCS is the perfect opportunity to ramble on and get my feet wet again. I am missing the blogging community.

I foolishly think I am doing OK. I tell myself that because I am physically putting effort into my yard, I am dealing with my emotional pain. Ha-ha. When I am working hard, my brain takes a short vacation from my worries. They don’t really go away, but I try and fool myself that I am handling it. I wish I could scrub away my problems like I scrub my patio tiles.

I am working on holding my boundaries to keep my sanity. I am saying “NO” to things that don’t feel right to me. I am saying nothing to poor decisions being made by others. It does no good to offer my 2cents when I am not listened to. It just makes things worse. In a long conversation last night, my tongue hurt from literally biting it numerous times. I am still proud of myself for keeping my side of the street clean. I dearly love some individuals who are making decisions that are counterproductive to their well-being. I have been notified of some people defaming me for standing by my boundaries. Day by day, the dramas are more disheartening. I need to find some peace.

My poor dog is terribly frightened by fireworks. Her whole body shakes and her heart rate is off the charts as the explosions go off. She runs around the house trying to find an escape from the noise. Every night as Disneyland lights off their fireworks, poor Annie gets stressed. I went out yesterday and purchased some things to try and help her. I bought a thunder shirt. She is on the edge of the size requirements. I bought a large, but it was a bit too big. I returned it and purchased a medium. I followed the directions on the package and give her a few treats when I put it on her. The pet store had a couple of types of CBD doggie meds. I took a gamble and purchased the one with more CBD but without Melatonin. I also went to the vet and purchased some prescription drops. I obviously won’t be giving Annie both meds, but I hope to find what’s best for her. I gave Annie the CBD tonight. She slept through the early fireworks but awoke as they continued. She was pretty mellow but still unhappy with the noise. Tomorrow, I will try the med later in the evening. The fireworks were extra-long tonight and Monday will be much worse.  I want to find something that works well so that I don’t need to scramble on Monday to help her stay calm. The fourth is a wonderful holiday celebration, but not for my dog.

 

19 thoughts on “SoCS – Where I Am or Where Am I? A Saturday Ramble

  1. It feels like my emotions are in shambles. I love blogging and it has been a life saver in many ways in the past. I know why I’ve not been up to blogging. SoCS is the perfect opportunity to ramble on and get my feet wet again. I am missing the blogging community.

    And YOU are missed, Lauren!

    I try and fool myself that I am handling it.

    What would actually “handling it” look like for you?

    I have been notified of some people defaming me for standing by my boundaries. Day by day, the dramas are more disheartening.

    Seriously? Just for saying ‘no’?

    Like

    1. You ask good questions David. It’s nice of you to say that I have been missed. I know I miss the blogging community. “Handling it” would mean not crying when I think about the problems of those I love. It’s hard to stay in my space and only offer an opinion when asked. Yes, saying to a loved one because of a challenge to my physical and emotional health has resulted in my character being maligned. It is sad. It adds to my pain. But, I am learning to stick to my truth and keep myself as well as possible.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Take care Lauren I love you posts you sound so grounded… I understand your feelings life can be so hard to cope with. I do hope the fireworks stop soon or that you find the right meds for Maggie. Sending you love and calm thoughts. 💜💜💜

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I hate that that the fireworks scare so many animals, too. We don’t have pets anymore, but there are lots in the neighborhood. I’ve been hearing a few pops and booms the past few days, but Monday will be the worst. Hope Annie and you, too can find a way to block out as much noise as you can. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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