I never had many friends growing up. I was never in the “popular” group. I was often a loner, the oddball. I was an outsider for a multitude of reasons. I was the lone Jewish kid who did not ever know enough about my own religion. I had a multitude of step-fathers in and out of the house. I was a skinny bean pole. We had very little money and I never had the right clothes or shoes.
I typically had one friend that knew most of what went on in my house. Being a loner meant I didn’t have to explain things. In high school I had two amazing friends who cared about me and I cared about them. One had tickets to concerts and Lakers games. She always took me with her and my world expanded exponentially. The other went a little “coo coo for coco puffs” in high school and we drifted apart.
My dear friend ended up perishing in a terrible car accident. Many secrets perished with her. When it occurred her mom asked me to come to the house. No one else was allowed to be there. It felt like we needed each other.
I was a young mom when I returned to college. No time for friends when you are a wife, mother of two, running a household, and worrying about every dime that needs to be spent. At 20 my life was very different from those I went to school with.
Working meant I had time for work friends, but most were just that. A few were very special to me. I never felt like I was as special to them.
Now in my senior years, for the first time in my life, I have the dearest friends. They know me, and still like me. I know them and adore them. I would do anything I could for them without a moments hesitation. There is no reason to hide who I am. Friends are those you choose to care about and love.